MORE FROM DAN JACOBY - The "Love" Bomber

"... LOVE BOMBING or showing an unusually intense interest in [someone’s] life and activities — is manipulative and deceitful ...particularly one at a vulnerable stage, such attention can be flattering, but [ ]it represents an attempt at mind control. Mind-control techniques such as love-bombing are designed to bypass a person’s intelligence and especially his critical-thinking skills.

When a lonely or hurting (emotionally or physically) person suddenly receives an overwhelming amount of love and acceptance, it is extremely difficult for them to stand back and assess the reasons for this or question something he desperately doesn’t want to have disappear." - Jason Gay, The Boston Phoenix

This is how cyberpaths rope you in and keep you in. As FAST as the attention and "love bombing" starts - it can come to a crashing stop. And the cyberpath will say they "can't control themselves" but they can and do. (Remember gridney/ yidwithlid did this to his Target #1 - and as soon as he was confronted - he stopped and ran away. Total control despite his protestation to the opposite. Leaving Target #1 twisting the wind and trauma bonded to him. On purpose. Because he wanted complete power over her & the relationship. There was nothing equal or loving on his part, about it. )

Notice the commonality of tactics between Jacoby? Gash? Hicks? Beckstead? etc... (see list at right for links to these stories)

By overwhelming you with love talk, attention, gifts, and sometimes sexuality - the cyberpath leaves you breathless, unable to think - you are in a sort of trance then. Very susceptible to suggestion. And then you are in their control.

Remember, the best way of killing someone is when you tell them that you love them because all her/his defenses go down. - Dr. Ludger Hofmann-Engl

Here's just one of Jacoby's numerous LOVE BOMBS to his victim. He's a piece of work:

From: Jacoby
To: victim
Date: Sun, 18 Dec 2005

I feel hopeless. I am a dead man without you, but I’m dying a slow death every time we hurt each other. You know I want you in my life. You ARE my life. I’m so lovesick it hurts even when I’m smiling. I’m sorry, but unless you didn't give me a thought this morning you must have known I would be devastated finding an empty mailbox in the morning - especially after crying out that I couldn't take much more (of our misunderstandings). (what happened - was she questioning him about his b.s.? LOL)

I love you. More than anyone could possibly love you. If you really believe that, ANYTHING I write that doesn't make sense or seems inappropriate shouldn't upset you so very much. (telling her how to feel about your sick requests, Jacoby?) I have nothing to lose and everything to gain. If I lose you, I die just as I would had we never met, only quicker. If we embrace each other, I will be blessed with a mortal life most people could only dream of.

I pray about us so many times during the day. I ask God to smile upon us, and to confirm in my heart that what we have is His blessing. My heart and prayers tell me you were brought to me to renew my spirit and give me a second chance at living. That's a big responsibility for you. (using spirituality & religion - one of the predator's LURES!)

I know you could move on without me and be fine. You're still healthy even with your withdrawal symptoms. You're beautiful. You've got friends who buy you thongs and ex's who want you back. If moving on is something YOU want to do - to unburden yourself from me - I will understand. I certainly wouldn't blame you. (Jacoby - the MARTYR MAN)

I’m willing to do everything in my power to keep the best thing that ever happened to me growing. Its only going to get tougher, and if I get sicker I may write even more senseless, tasteless babble. (placing blame on his illness! LOL Sounds like Yidwithlid blaming his ADHD)There may be days when I’m too sick to email at all. There will certainly be many days when technical problems keep us apart. You have your bad days, too. Even with all these obstacles, the thought of our precious first embrace makes all the suffering and struggling seem insignificant.

I love you completely, Victim. I need you if I am to ever live and be happy again. I know for a fact that I would die for you. I would hate to die without you. Every minute that passes knowing things aren't right between us is no different than slowly bleeding to death. I don't want to die. I want to live and spend every waking moment making you happy.

No more silly thoughts. No more mental torture. Just kindness, compassion, and love. The kind only you and I are capable of experiencing.

I’m here if you'll have me. I’m gone forever if we can't love each other and show it.

I love you with every bit of my being. Danny xxxxxxx
_______________

Jacoby wrote:

I'm pretty darn tired of stress. I had much more fun and much less stress talking about loving you up all day and night. (her and all his other online playmates - who think he's for real when he's just having fun at their expense!)

We will cut! Standing still too long is the same as going backwards. Its been a very rough year. Full of medical messes and other stress that has taken its toll. I breezed through the first 40 mgs of my taper. Gotta stay focused.

Victim, dear. You know you mean everything to me. You are the REASON I love, the REASON I breathe, and the REASON I live and fight for my healing. I can't let a single moment pass without thinking of you. There is only you in my heart, and I will never, EVER let you go.

I love you so deeply, TV. Danny xxxxxxx

(Jacoby must have a template of these cyber-love bombs that he just inserts his cyber-flavor of the moment's name into!)

Remember: you can NOT love someone you have not meet in person, let alone someone you haven't spent significant face time with. And NOT TIME IN BED - with them, their friends, your friends, your families - day to day living. Love grows. To the cyberpath LOVE is just a word! A word to manipulate and twist your emotions and give them power over you.

Let's look at Jacoby in the love-bombing context. And see some of what he "gets" out of his target. Remember he'd been guilting her for 'intimate photos'? Let's say now, he's told her he's divorcing, broke and pretty much a 'single parent' with little funds to get anything for Christmas. So guess who comes through for this "poor poor man"? And Jacoby's twisted her head so much - she's programmed to give - give - give.

Here's one of his "set up" emails to fleece her:

Jacoby wrote:

you know you don't have to get me nuthin'. (isn't that code for "BUT I WILL LOVE YOU IF YOU DO!")

i was looking at getting [my child] a printer for Christmas. she asked for one last summer that printed photos and stuff but it was a little pricey. she knows i don't have any money. besides, she will be so busy [while away] i don't think she will miss it. i may order her something so she can have it when she comes home next week. (unless you get it for her First!!)

you need your money. (guilt AGAIN! remember, narcissistic types use a lot of opposite or backward talk to get what they want. ie: DON'T means DO!)

i wish i felt better. the good news is i am finally on the macintosh (that Victim bought for Jacoby!) all the time now. even through the pain i can manage a smile when i use it. (because I'm so pleased with myself that I coerced and fleeced you out of your hard-earned money)

i love you. db xxxxxxx
_____________________


from 12/ 2006
Victim: Are you there, honey?
Dan: i am. not well. you ok?
V: did you get my last note?
D: no honey. been waiting.
V: i wrote over 90 minutes ago
D: i didnt get it sweetheart. can you sent it again.
V: are you chatting to someone? (he sure is!!!)
D: no honey (lie)
V: i re-sent the note
D: thank you honey (like Ed Hicks -- easier to use HONEY than her name)
V: i dunno why you did'nt get the last one
V: maybe my email server is playin' up again
D: im reading it, hun. 1 sec.
V: ok
D: honey you know better
V: better than what?
D: i dont wanna open up any more wounds
D: we got enough
V: i just hate it
D: im sorry hun
D: i do too
D: its hard enough gettin through the days
D: and i love the ocean
V: we went through so much at the hands of those people
D: i listen to it every day
D: yes we did
V: i really resent them for that
D: i do too, hun
D: more than you know
D: i dont like bitter unforgiveing self-centered people (even though he is one -- he's talking about the people who tried to WARN the VICTIM!!)
V: that's why i want no truck with them
D: yes ma'am
D: this is hard for me. i dont see you online.
V: no i did'nt make myself "visible"
D: oh ok
D: i just have a hard time sitting up and typing, though i love my computer (he sure does)
D: and my CK undies (Dan, how did you explain to your wife that you got some woman to send you UNDERWEAR?)
V: did you try em?
D: yes
V: are they a snugfit?
D: snug
V: lol
V: did you listen to all angels, honey?
D: every day, hunny.
V: those kids are only 17
D: Agnus Dei is one of my favorite songs of all time. yes. i read about them on the web.
D: from "Platoon"
D: its lovely
V: i love "the flower duet"
D: me too
V: and "steal away"
V: and i adore "songbird"
D: i love the songbird video
V: yes
V: do theose cd's help you relaxhoney?
D: yes
D: i love the waves so much
V: good
V: i wanted to bring the ocean to you
D: you did
V: you can lay there and imagine you have your feet in the water
D i do
V: good
V: you want me to go?
D: i just have troub;e typing
V: yes
D: but i love you
V: i love you, too
D: you made my christmas
V: i'm glad
D: i have all my toys around me (the ones he scammed from Victim by pleading poverty? or the other online targets he scams & TOYS with?)
D: the next time i get dressed and go out, i'm wearing my jersey.
V: it's the nicest england shirt to date
D: its lovely
V: best design
D: i adore it
V: 3 lions
V: cross of st george
D: its gorgeous
D: and it smells nice
D: smells like your house (how would he know? see how he inserts himself into her REALITY to anchor his presence -- mind control!)
V: does it?
V: what does it smell of?
D: i dunno. does it? potporri
D: sp?
V: prolly me
D: its nice
V: eden
V: cacharel
D: delicious.
V: i folded it all nice
V: with lotsa loving care
D: i could tell
D: i really could
D: it took me hours to open everything
V: lol
V: there wasn't much there
D: ther was
V: i wanted to sed much more
V: send
D: you sent too much
V: i just wanted to bring you some sunshine
D: you always do
V: would you miss me if i was gone?
D: yes
V: that's cuz you're used to me
V: like a pair of comfy old slippers
D: i would like to think so
V: did you taste a little bitta chocolate?
D: just a little
D: the cookies
V: lol
V: you mean the chocolate shortbread?
D: YES!!!
D: awesome
V: at least xxxx will ahve the pleasure
D: she is gonna be thrilled
V: i hope it gets there before she leaves
D: it will get there monday morning
V: good
V: did you tell her
D: yes i did
D: shes thrilled
V: bless her heart
D: shes a happy girl, hun
V: she's in for the experience of a lifetime
D: its gonna change her life
V: it'll bring her closer to God
V: for sure
V: i could smell Jerusalem on my packages
D: she asked me what i wanted for christmas...
D: i said...
D: a prayer from you from galilee on christmas day
V: wonderful
V: you got your spirit very well taken care of
V: i hope you place your mezuzah when you're feeling up to it
D: i need to find a place big enough. the ones ive seen used to be so tiny, but its gorgeous. i opened it and touched the words.
V: i was going to get you a smaller one honey
D: i love this one
V: but they did'nt have smaller sterling silver ones
V: they were the nicest ones
V: the silver i mean
D: this one is perfect
V: i thought maybe it would be a little on the large side
D: its lovely
V: i have the exact same one
D: do ya?
V: yes
V: i bought them for us both
D: i love em
D: i have it righ here
D: right
V: i touch it each time i pass
D: "over", lol
V: lol
V: yeah
V: over
D: my shoulders hurt, honey. thats why its hard to chat versus just typing (besides I got porn babes and other targets waiting!!)
V: okay
V: i'll go
D: i wish u were here
V: i know honey
V: i do too
D: i should rest
V: okay
D: i pray we both sleep well, sweetheart. you know i do.
D: are you there, honey
V: yeah
D: God bless you, sweatheart
D: and keep you safe
V: God bless you, too
D: please have sweet dreams. sweet kisses just for you.
V: sweet dreams
D: Goodnight, TV. i love you more than you think i do. i really do. xxxxxxxxxx
V: i know you do, sweetheart
V: i love you, too
V: sweet kisses, baby
D: sweet kisses xxxxxx

MORE FROM JACOBY SOON!! ...If we all can stomach it!

WARNING (2009) - Jacoby has found his way BACK on to the recovery forums (such as benzobuddies, etc) using a new IP number and false identities (ex: "Nurse Tanya" and "Elwood"). Despite the forum managers saying they have banned him forever - they have not been able to stop this remorseless predator! One forum manager refuses to listen and remove his multiple identities. Beware!

Daniel Jacoby. - The Guilt Tripping, Whining Pervert

Herewith are a few emails between Dan Jacoby (aka DB) & just one of his victims.
Notice the "love bombing" comments from him. Seems Jacoby asked her for some 'intimate' photos as proof of her love for him - while reassuring her his love is real. Now remember, these guys are the same ones who, when caught, say "IT WAS ALL A GAME", and "SHE KNEW IT WAS A GAME AND PLAYED ALONG" as well as calling these 'scorned women' LIARS, KOOKS, STALKERS and NUTJOBS. Tell us:

• Does this really sound like a 'game'?
• Does this sound like this victim made up her pain & concern out of whole cloth?
• Does this sound like Jacoby never asked for her attentions or encouraged them?
• Do the victims do these things because they are sexual predators, too - or because they truly LOVE these men (who turn out to be: Predators)?

(BTW - these emails sound eerily familiar to BECKSTEAD, GRIDNEY/ YIDWITHLID, ED HICKS and JOHN GASH. Additionally, very much like the overwhelming techniques used in sexual seduction - overwhelm the victim with emotion when all the predator really wants is sex.) "I LOVE YOU" are just words to these guys. It has the same emotional impact to them as "I NEED MORE TOILET PAPER." Unfortunately, the victim's bondedness is very real.

(Please note that the victim in this case is RECOVERING FROM BENZO ADDICTION. So notice how Jacoby uses the same psychological/ chemical pathways to lure, manipulate & hook her in! He has done this to other & will again and again until stopped)

Women instinctively know what relieves anxiety and reduces stress hormones levels - emotional, physical and sexual intimacy.

The bonding hormone oxytocin is one of the most powerful natural anti-anxiety chemicals there is! That is why sex is so relaxing. During sex, oxytocin is released and you feel not only happy and bonded with your mate, but afterwards, you are relaxed and anxiety-free. (Yes, even CYBERSEX!)

Early in the relationship, the psychopath isolates his woman from the rest of the world and her social network. Therefore, she has little emotional support from others that would normally serve to help her reduce or manage her anxiety effectively.

Being with a psychopath is anxiety-producing. The psychopath has a fight with her raising her level of anxiety. She thinks about leaving or takes steps to leave the relationship and that triggers profound anxiety in her. Without friends and family as support to help her manage her anxiety, she is in need of anxiety relief. She turns to the psychopath himself - both the creator and reliever of stress. He gratefully relieves her anxiety through (cyber)sex.

“It feels like a drug. Am I addicted to him?” Three things are at play in her attachment:
1. The high levels of attachment she is prone to because of her temperament.
2. The high levels of bonding she is feeling that she thinks the psychopath is mutually feeling.
3. She mistakes intensity for real connection.

These intense and yet different connections will lay the groundwork for the pathological love relationship dynamics which we will discuss later in the book. For now, understand her ability to deeply attach is significantly larger than the person who does not have her strong attachment trait.

Additionally, high levels of relationship investment set up an entrapping cycle within the pathological love relationship. If she pleases the psychopath with (cyber)sex and he praises her for it, her positive relationship reward was both the feeling she had in pleasing him (and herself) and the praise and stabilization of the relationship she experienced.

Add to it the “buzz” of the bonding hormones and her anxiety reduction and you have a cycle of bonding that entraps her.

- Sandra Brown, MA - WOMEN WHO LOVE PSYCHOPATHS

Jacoby apparently has a habit of taking screen shots of his victims on webcam while chatting with them. WithOUT their knowledge or permission. For insurance... when he dumps them for fresh prey. Then threatens to post these private shots to the world (or maybe he sells them to online porn sites!)

As always, our comments are in Dark Blue. - Fighter
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From: DAN JACOBY

If I loved MY WIFE like I love you and was in my situation, yes... I would have asked. I wish you would have told me weeks ago. I'll never bring it up again. (SURE you will! and the only person you love? IS YOURSELF!!)

-----Message-----
FROM: Victim
TO: Jacoby

No honey, I don't have to ask. You know I always look for reassurance, because of our situation.

Sweetheart, sometimes I wonder what you would think of me for being so forward. I know we have our intimacy, and we are very explicit during those times. I'm totally comfortable with it, because I love you.

When you totally and absolutely love a woman you don't want them to compromise themselves by doing something like sending nude pictures of themselves out into cyberspace. Would you EVER have asked YOUR WIFE to do anything like that? What would you think of her if she did? I am only making a comparison. I'm not writing this because I don't trust you. It just bothers me that you asked me to do it in the first place. You know what I'm trying to say.

I'm sorry about sending more than one video. I hate you to hurt.

I love you, Danny
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From: DAN JACOBY
To: Victim

Just forget about it. I never loved MY WIFE anywhere near as much as I love you. Not even close.

You put everything I write under a microscope. I wouldn't ever let anyone see those pictures of you because I’m an honorable man and I love you and ONLY you. You shouldn't have even had to ask such a silly question. (REMEMBER HE SAID THIS! And notice how Jacoby makes his VICTIM FEEL GUILTY for hedging or asking questions!! Guilt dumping!! Blame shifting!!)

I was a fool for ever asking you to do such a thing. It was wrong of me. (YES IT WAS!!)

You know you can put files in a password protected ZIP file so no one can see them but me, don't you? (yet he KEEPS ON PRODDING!! And he will only "protect" them until he needs to harass or threaten you into silence about his true nature! Then you will be all over the net and at the police with Dan's SELECTIVE INFORMATION)

I never expected you to do anything that made you uncomfortable, but I CERTAINLY didn't expect you to string me along and not just say "I’m uncomfortable sending these over the internet". That would have been a lot more honest and understandable than "I've gotta top off my tan". I’m sure you look wonderful. I even told you I just wanted more "regular" pictures of you. At least a chance to see you like your co-workers or strangers in the street. Still nothing.

I love you as much as ever, but I’m sick as hell inside for ever asking such a terrible thing and for being strung along week after week. (Check the GUILT, OBLIGATION and MIND-TWISTING bull Jacoby lays on here)

I’m crushed and ashamed. I hope you can forgive me. I’m trying hard not to stomp this gadget into the ground. (boo hoo hoo - he can always look at internet porn instead of trying to cyber-rape a normal woman who he's already brainwashed. But no... he keeps on)

I love you. Danny


-----ANOTHER Message-----
FROM: Victim

Dan, you loved YOUR WIFE far more than you love me, because you married her, and she's the mother of your child. I understand that. I wanted to send those pictures to you. They're still there on the camera. The thing that phased me, and "threw" me, somewhat, was when you said that I shouldn't worry about you showing them to people, because I could always use the "private" one of you as a weapon. (did Jacoby tell her something previously about HIS M.O.? Cyberpaths often slip up and foreshadow their future threats, smear and attacking behavior early on - if one pays attention.)

I can't count the times I've been about to send them to you, and I always stop myself. Now you probably feel differently to me. I just don't know. I'm crying. I'll have to go. This is the reason I would never tell you right out that I was dubious about sending them. I was always scared of your reaction, and that you'd feel differently to me because I did'nt send them. Now you can't even bring yourself to write "I love you". (Now Jacoby has apparently made her feel his LOVE will be withdrawn because she didn't send the intimate pics. Sick boy)

I love you, just the same as always. - VICTIM
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From: JACOBY
To: Victim

Its got nothing to do with the "pictures". I don't need to see your perfectly maintained body to love you. I asked you SEVERAL times if you were comfortable about it. All I got was "You'll get 'em. Have I ever failed you?". All you had to do was tell me the truth. You know how much YOU mean to me. You think I would hurt YOU to get my hands on some stupid "nudie" pictures? Thanks for thinking so highly of me. (Jacoby again laying on the GUILT, OBLIGATION and COVERT comments about his VERY CONDITIONAL "love." Remember he said this!! He's most probably done this before to victims and is angry these pics aren't as easy to obtain this time. He's blame-shifting because his victim's gut is telling her something's not right... and he's having to work overtime to override it)

How can you POSSIBLY love me???? I’m not a gentleman, you fear my reactions. I just don't get it. I’m going fucking insane. (boo hoo again, Jacoby)

Anything else been on your mind for the last four months that you want to tell me about? (a cyber tantrum from the thwarted predator. Typical. Now she's stuck between her ethics and his brainwashing. This is a situation that, in one way or another ALL our victims find themselves in. Truly sick on Jacoby's part)

I feel like a worthless excuse for one of God's children. (you are, Danny Boy -- you are - for even SUBJECTING this poor, hurting woman to your sociopathic baloney IN this position)

Goodnight. I love you, too. I hate my life though. God be with you. I’m signing off. (That's right, drop in as MUCH guilt as possible so the VICTIM is absolutely tortured while you're offline not even thinking about it and doing whatever with whoever)

-----ANOTHER Message-----
From: Victim

Does your love for me really depend on a couple of explicit pictures? (unfortunately - it does. Jacobyneeds insurance for when he drop kicks your mind, heart & soul eventually)

I love you with all my heart and soul. (But that's not enough for Dan. Because he is pathological and has no heart or soul. Just sick need and deviant desires)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From: Dan Jacoby
To: Victim

I’m devoted to you, Victim. (Until I log on with someone else or I get bored with you and you darned reality-checks) My relationship with MY WIFE has been over for many years. It took this illness and being stuck at home to wake me up to the reality of our marriage. I’m yours and yours alone. (For this email only) You're stuck with me, too. Is that OK? :-) (no comment! ick!)

I love you. Danny

-----ANOTHER Message-----
From: Victim

You know that you have no need at all to worry! I am devoted to you, sweetheart. You're my all consuming passion. (Unfortunately, he is) I know that you are a moral man, and if by chance YOUR WIFE asked to "try again" you would. I would never, ever judge you for that. Do you honestly think that I could give my heart to anyone else, after I've given it totally to you? You should never, ever worry about me walking away from you! (She couldn't if she wanted to because now she's not just brainwashed - she's TRAUMA BONDED to him; thanks to his playing on her guilt and fair-mindedness)

I love you. Victim
~~~~~~~~~~~~

Notice the Oh-So- NOT-NICE way Dan gossips with another person here about other people on the recovery boards.

TO: Dan Jacoby

Hey Dan... I don't want to upset you with this gossip thing or get anyone in trouble but I also understand that things need to be dragged out in the open to heal...I think you'll probably understand... I would want to know.

When I first started talking with M he said to be very careful of you and J. J had given me the creeps anyway so that was no big issue but I was really surprised about you. He said that he had heard from a very reliable source, that he trusts implicitly (DON'T quote me but I assumed he was talking about A), that you and J took advantage of a girl called E and convinced her in her vulnerable state into giving you a very explicit web cam sex show.

To be honest I just believed what M had said until I saw you put up a post about E and I got the impression you had been close and were very upset about her being taken advantage of my "certain" forum members. That was when I realized that anything M said could have been a load of bollocks and said to suit him. I think maybe he was jealous of you and A? Who knows.

When M was here, just before he left, he stirred up trouble on [support forum] by posting a comment as a "guest" when the forum was in maintenance mode. He said something like "B must die" - very grownup! lol. Of course they logged the IP address and when I joined up they put two and two together and thought I was an imposter. I was really upset and explained that M was staying here. They accepted that but I still felt a bit alienated and mistrusted. M decided he would try and "fix" this by writing an email to C even though had asked for him to just leave it all alone so it could die down and I could fit in. I knew what he was doing but pretended I didn't to see if M was prepared to lie about it. Of course he did lie about it but C and I have discussed it since and their correspondence went back and forth for some time. I have yet to see copies of what M talked about but C kept saying "why don't you just show J these emails! so she knows it's ok" but he wouldn't - he is a creepy manipulative bastard (scuse my language).

C thought it was very wierd. What made me laugh is that M couldn't work out how they had formed a link between me and him - I'm not sure he even understood what an IP address is.. LOL.

Since then all I have heard is that the forum was having trouble with predators - to be honest I thought they might have meant M since he is working his way through a few himself. J was a big offender but think everyone was aware of that. Apparently it ran deeper than that and the gossip mill was saying G had been a victim but was refusing to name the culprit - maybe why you were implicated because of your close friendship with her? (probably was JACOBY that exploited her!) That's all I have... apart from who is gay and who is not... LOL.

Hope you are relaxing with the tele and this is not causing you too much stress. I would love to talk to VICTIM. She seems so down to earth - my kinda girl! I shall send her an email when I get a chance. (like gridney/ YidwithLid -- using the good words of one "Target" to work over another "Target"!)

J
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From:
Sun, 4 Sep 2005 09:27:25 -0400

J

I'm stunned, but not surprised. I spent the night with my mind racing and experiencing a full spectrum of emotions ranging from anger, relief, and deep sadness. The good news is I am no longer banging my head against the wall wondering where Y got all these ridiculous ideas about me, including the accusations that I was "hacking" into the forum, lurking "invisibly", and deleting posts without authorization. (er... because you WERE? Protesting too much -- a predator give-away!)

When I first joined the forum many months ago, J immediately began writing me. I found his pseudo-intellectual ramblings about drug addiction to be strange and thought he even looked "dirty", but never really paid much else attention to him. I was never a drinker or drug user, and being in the company of some of "street" drug addicts was new to me, and I was a bit naïve.

A short time later, E (a prostitute and heroin addict at the time) contacted me and asked if she could confide in me. It was then that she told me about J and all the twisted things he made her do. I stayed in contact with E until she kicked her drug habit, got a "real" job, and reconciled with her husband. I would like to think the encouragement and support I gave her helped her to break out of her destructive lifestyle. (Aren't you SPECIAL, Dan!! No one sings your praises louder than YOU!) Ever since then, J (knowing I was on to him [because I am the smartest person in the world... LOL]) would post on my threads as if we were best friends. Both of my parents were in law enforcement and checked him out. He's a twice-convicted felon and has served time in Federal prison. (parents in law enforcement? checking someone out? that's not really legal to go through another person's records and passing it along with gossip unless its for court, etc. Also Jacoby warning that he has "friends in high places" should anyone call him on his exploits. If Jacoby's parents were in law enforcement -- he should ask them for a good rehab program for sociopaths & sex addicts.)

A is a good friend who is currently in a 9-month long inpatient detox program in the UK. All we ever talked about was her dog and her horse. A was friends with S, who M "met" in Los Angeles on his way home from New Zealand. I won't even get into the rumors I heard about THAT woman! (how many did you start? or did she rebuff your advances?)

G still swears to this very day that she never accused me of being a "predator" (but if she did she was right on the money!), but she became very cold and withdrawn right about the time M started putting the new forum together. We became very good friends because she lives in the neighborhood where I grew up. G WORSHIPS Y, and if Y repeated anything M may have told her about me, G would take it as Gospel. G herself can be a very manipulative person and seems to thrive on her illness, though I wouldn't wish her suffering on anyone. She sent me an email regarding my commentary on my PERSONAL medical journal and referred to me as showing a pattern of "verbal abuse" (again, she was right! and notice the lack of empathy on Jacoby's part for anything but HIS 'reputation'). The irony of her choosing those words to describe my reaction to this whole situation is beyond amusing! Maybe she should move in with M for three months, LOL!

VICTIM and I have remained strong throughout all of this. We are both counting the minutes until we can be together. All of this drama has been very hard on both of us, but we're still deeply in love with each other. She's one in a million and I hate that she has had to go through all of this with me. As if benzo withdrawal wasn't tough enough! I know she would love to hear from you. We also know who's gay, and even THAT has effected our relationship (a story for another day), LOL!

I really appreciate you sharing this with me. It does provide some sense of closure and a chance to heal, even though it may only be the tip of the iceberg. When I calm down and get over this I would love to drop M a quick, friendly email if you still have his address. Oh wait - why would I need that from YOU if I could simply "hack" into the forum and get it? :-) (smug)

I hope you're feeling great and are being good to yourself. You have so much to be proud of. I'll be praying for you,

Dan

WARNING (2009) - Jacoby (a web designer & computer expert!) has found his way BACK on to the recovery forums using a new IP number and false identities (ex: "Nurse Tanya" and "Elwood"). Despite the forum managers saying they have banned him forever - they have not been able to stop this remorseless predator! One forum manager refuses to listen and remove his multiple identities. Beware!

MARCH 2008 PREDATOR OF THE MONTH: DANIEL JACOBY

Jacby's very very similar to many of our other cyberpaths. Follows the same lines and preys on wounded persons. He's a flaming narcissist and feels all powerful behind a keyboard. He scams those he preys on out of goods, costing them thousands of dollars. He is truly after only a couple things: FREE CYBERSEX and FUN & MIND-GAMES.

- Does he tell any of his victims he's playing? NO!
- Do his victims know his true intentions? NO!

And he likes to threaten and intimidate them when they find out who & what he truly is.

He bores easily and will move on to new prey either after or have a few on the go simultaneously.

He will even lie to law enforcement to get his VICTIMS charged with harrassment or defamation. But those lies don't hold water - and eventually he is show as the "boy who cried wolf."

He's nothing special, he's a soul-sucking liar, a keyboard jockey who's never gone past the high school game of telling a woman he doesn't even know he LOVES her - and then uses her for his sexual gratification. His M.O. is as common as grass. So enjoy this month's adventures with "DB." His victim gives an overview:
Jacoby hangs around support forums looking for vulnerable women coming off prescription drugs.

He scans blogs looking for an "in" then pounces with his "look how cool but 'sensitive' I am" routine and proceeds to suck trusting women into his filthy pit of lies and deceit. He lives with his wife, even though he spins a yarn about "waiting for his divorce to be finalized."

He lies about his alleged poverty and takes what he can from good hearted women when all the time he's driving around in his fancy Dodge Viper.

He's a dirty, narcissistic bottom-dweller, who, when his victims wake up to the the snake that he is, turns on and denigrates them in a most disgusting manner. He lives on the energy of women and drama under the pretence of love and devotion. He fits the profile of the narcissistic cyberpath perfectly.

Sometimes I wonder if he even took a prescription medication. His taper-off seems to have lasted for years. I suspect he stumbled across these kind of sites after playing this game on different forums where other vulnerable women would be. I see him on other boards now acting like an angel and taking everyone in, and it makes my stomach turn. I know for a fact he's smearing me like he did about other women to me. I should have listened to his other victims when they tried to warn me.

As I said he is allegedly in the throes of withdrawal from medication himself. I don't know to this day if or how much of this is true. I do know there've been plenty of ALLEGED hospital visits. I wouldn't put anything past him.

I was warned by other women back in the day that he was a sexual predator, but refused to listen. I was "in love" after he'd used seduction techniques he's honed over time on me. He always used to tell me that the other women were just jealous and were "crazy, nut-jobs or slutty tramps" (Sound familiar, readers? Probably saying the same about her now too.)

Of course I believed him, because I was in the height of withdrawal, I felt he was a lifeline for me as well as being fooled that he was honest. Additionally he was always "my poor baby who nobody understood but me"; effectively targeting my caretaker instincts.

He was booted from the forum where I met him and transferred his attention to other similar forums looking for prey. (Typical. The Cyberpath doesn't change his behavior or M.O. - just his hunting grounds or his IP or his nickname)

There's one poor woman in particular who hangs on his every word and I swear she'd take a bullet for him. If only she knew the opinion of her he shared with me! (again, sound familiar Readers?)

This filth scans the members list and singles out women that catch his predatory eye then watches until you're posting that you're really having a hard time and voila! He will play on the memory of a loved one who has passed away to get you to think of him the way you thought of them. He'll then try to replace them in your heart and mind and "be there" for you. He'll open you up and lead you along but the truth is you're not the only one. (See LURES OF THE ONLINE PREDATOR)

The pills you're withdrawing from blind you and he doesn't break contact for long enough to give you a chance to think or to come up for air. (Love Bombing) That is until you outwear your usefullness, like I did. That's when he gets nasty and turns it all back onto you.

He's warned me that he'll smear my good character should I expose him for what he is, but let him try. (Narcissistic Rage)

It was shared with me a while back that he persuaded & coaxed a very vulnerable female who was an ex heroin addict to perform lurid sex acts on the webcam. He denied it and blamed someone else. (of course! cyberpath's take ZERO responsibility. Some even get a counselor, clergyman, etc to GO ALONG with the "she's just as guilty" b.s. they throw at their victims) He blamed another man and accused him of other misdeed (in reality, probably done by Jacoby!).

He's a filthy, stinking beast. I can't let him do this to any other women and I feel like I should exonerate those I didn't believe when they tried to warn me. I also "googled" a lot of information on him and found him registered on "sexforums" among others. He freaked that I had the audacityto do that. (An innocent person wouldn't CARE!!)
He asked me over and over to perform lurid sex acts on a webcam and when I refused he'd freak and say that if I loved him I would do it to "make him happy". I put all this down to his illness & withdrawal symptoms, but realize now that he really is the manipulative predator I was told that he was.

He just thinks he's superior to everyone else, and others (especially women) are beneath him. Some of the things he's said about females he acts friendly with now have been despicable. Heck, he even talks trash about some other men he's friendly with, too. He acts very friendly & familiar with them, but he calls them awful names. They'd get the shock of their lives if they knew what he really thinks of them.

Women should beware and stay away from this low-life. He's an emotional leech that'll suck you dry and think nothing of it.

In reflection, I wonder what I ever saw in him. I usually like a guy with more hair. He never would remove that cap from the many pics and webcam stuff I saw.

I have prayed long and hard before I decided to do this. It's not a "knee-jerk" reaction and I am not a &"woman scorned"; as he told me he will portray me as if I ever came forward with all this. (Don't worry - they ALL do that - it gets tired after a while. Readers if someone online is telling you "so & so is a scorned/ jealous woman"? Make it your BUSINESS to talk to that scorned/ jealous woman. Its a MAJOR RED FLAG that you're dealing with a cyberpath!)

This is the difference between right and wrong; and doing the "right thing" has always, ALWAYS been extrememly important to me. I honestly believe that evil only prospers for so long and good will always win out. I may have done some wrong in believing him, but I am here to dust myself off and stand up for myself and others Jacoby may have harmed.

This man raped my soul and deserves to be shown for exactly what he is. A sick, twisted monster. I just thank God I've been blessed with a conscience & empathy. If this piece of filth was even half a real man he'd get down on his knees and ask God and me for forgiveness.

At the very least he'd pay me back my money. I won't hold my breath, though. He has the morals of a flea on a rat. If I can save even ONE WOMAN from going through the HELL that I'M GOING THOUGH, it'll be worth it all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(one big warning sign here... notice how Jacoby talks about his WIFE - Lisa. If they dis their spouses -- do a background check!! And remember: YOU ARE NEXT ON THE "DIS LIST")

From: "Dan"
Tue, 20 Jun 2006 16:13:24 -0400
Subject: RE: *

It's nasty. As my stomach gets full and the heat gets more intense, the nerves in my mouth and throat go in to overdrive. Used to be sometimes things got better as the day went on. Now they just get more intense. I can start swallowing therapy any time I want, but it seems pointless if my neck and throat muscles are going to be in rebound spasms as I taper no matter what. I would rather do therapy once I know I have no medications in the way. We'll see how things go in the coming weeks. I want to eat and speak again so badly. I know you're too fragile for any more grief right now. Yeah. A repeat of last summer and then some. :-/

Lisa doesn't care. That's what I'm talking about when I say she's mean. She knows I would have loved to have seen 1 or 2 pictures. They had a cake with a picture of N as a baby and on her 18th birthday. Never saw it. Not even a photo. Its just not right.

I'm so exhausted from this heat. Praying it lets up and doesn't get worse through August.

Did you see J wrote a book about benzos? He mentions my game site (ToadGames.com)
in it a few times. I chuckled when I saw it was dedicated to people like G, G, and ME, LOL. I bet they just fumed when they saw that! (his favorite word? ME!!)

He really can write. It's a shame he has such a twisted motive behind everything. Lots of odd people in this benzo world. Can't wait to leave it all behind.

I love you. Danny xxxxxx

BARF!

JACOBY'S WEB DESIGN SITE

JACOBY'S GAMES SITE

As always, our comments were in dark blue. More as the month wears on about Dan Jacoby and his Cyberpathic Emotional, Sexual & Financial Vampirism.

WARNING (2009) - Jacoby (a web designer & computer expert!) has found his way BACK on to the recovery forumsusing a new IP number and false identities (ex: "Nurse Tanya" and "Elwood"). Despite the forum managers saying they have banned him forever - they have not been able to stop this remorseless predator! One forum manager refuses to listen and remove his multiple identities. Beware!