I met Nathan E.B. Thomas. Jr. on Interracial Matcher website in August 2004. (uh-oh ONLINE DATING! Here we go again!) He sent me a short polite email saying that it was my eyes that got him. (note he said the SAME thing with Victim #1)
Everything depends on the target of your seduction. Study your prey thoroughly, and choose only those who will prove susceptible to your charms. The right victims are those for whom you can fill a void, who see in you something exotic. They are often isolated or at least somewhat unhappy (perhaps because of recent adverse circumstances), or can easily be made so-for the completely contented person is almost impossible to seduce.
I went away with my children on a holiday the following weekend, and when I returned he had sent me another email asking how the holiday was. Then I received a photo of him. A very straight forward photo of himself standing beside his BMW, and he also sent a poem along with his email.
He told me that his "beloved wife Felicia had died of cancer about 8 years ago". (again the same lies he told Victim #1).
To further win trust, exchange honesty for virtue: establish your "sincerity" by confessing ... -it doesn't have to be real. Sincerity is more important than goodness. Play the victim, then transform your target's sympathy into love.
He sent many many more emails from then on, and included poems that he wrote (probably same poems he sent to all his other victims), as well as songs in almost every other email (exactly the same M.O. as Victim #1).
The trick to making them listen is to say what they want to hear, to fill their ears with whatever is pleasant to them. This is the essence of seductive language. Inflame people's emotions with loaded phrases, flatter them, comfort their insecurities, envelop them in fantasies, sweet words, and promises, and not only will they listen to you, they will lose their will to resist you. Keep your language vague, letting them read into it what they want. Use writing to stir up fantasies and to create an idealized portrait of yourself.
When I asked him what he did for a living, he said that he "caught bad guys". He led me to believe that he was a police officer of some sort, but , after we had met in person, he told me in a rental vehicle, which was always a big black or white Lincoln SUV (he said these rental cars were the only safe place to talk to me about his 'secret job') that he worked with for CIA, with Special Services. (lie! so many Cyberpaths tell women this we have lost count - so has the CIA. Thomas gets all his fantasies from the spy movies he watches and takes notes from, apparently obsessively)
[military]... careers attract men who enjoy power. Furthermore, psychopaths often claim to have done a lot of things in the military that they never did (and some weren’t even in the military). Many psychopaths like to claim they were a mercenary in a war, a political hostage, Navy Seal, or CIA operatives—often none of which is true. Interestingly, what they claim to have done always portrays them in a position of authority or hero-like.
Sandra Brown, MA - WOMEN WHO LOVE PSYCHOPATHS
He would never tell me about how he spent the money or where he had been. He led me to believe he had been with the CIA or other highly secretive government operations.
"Rebecca's Story" - WOMEN WHO LOVE PSYCHOPATHS
He said that after his "wife, Felicia" died that he took on this job after retiring from the military as a sargeant major with the US Air Force. (he was Chief of Housing of the 6th ASG in Germany - NOT a combat officer!)
He told me that he also paid for his mother's condominium and that he had six siblings (portraying himself as wealthy - no wonder he's so 'touchy' about money now and trying to present Victim #2 as 'greedy' LOL! Because being wealthy was part of his self-made fantasy world).
He sent many poems, emails many times every day, said that he "cared for his mother", etc etc. He made me believe I had found an exceptional man who made me willing to open my heart again.
The entire time he knew everything about me, and profiled, groomed and lured me like he did all the other vulnerable all the women he hurt. He had no concern for how vulnerable I and my children may have been -- or anyone else. Looking back, it all make sense now - there were times I would cry over certain things and he would show no emotion whatsoever. (because he's probably a PSYCHOPATH!)
The purpose of the luring stage is to hook her. The purpose of the honeymoon stage is to hoodwink her. In the psychopath’s arsenal to achieve this hooking and hoodwinking, is any person, place, thing, word, or behavior that will sell her on his illusion. While she is reeling in flattery, swimming in oxytocin, and snuggling up to his stories of their future lives together…the psychopath is solidifying his internal imprint in her by his use of trance and capitalizing on her suggestibility. -
Sandra Brown, MA - WOMEN WHO LOVE PSYCHOPATHS
He first visited my family and I in November 2004, and then returned to spend Christmas 2004 with us, taking me away for a few days to Whistler Mountain in Canada. He paid for Christmas gifts for my children, the hotel and everything else, totally sweeping me off of my feet.
Tension and disharmony must be instilled in your targets' minds. Stir within them feelings of discontent, an unhappiness with their circumstances and with themselves: their life lacks adventure...
He made a point of sitting down with my 16 year old son and asking his permission to date me and promised to "never hurt me". (LOL! He was seeing Victim #1 at the same time and it is believed at LEAST one other woman! And this is not including his wife, Georgine - who was sitting in Texas probably waiting for him to come home from his 'latest secret mission'.)
Never appear discouraged by people's resistance, or complaints. Instead, meet the challenge by doing something extreme or chivalrous.
He came back again in February 2005 on Valentines Day, and showered me and my children with gifts. By March 2005 he paid for me to come to Germany, which I was very nervous about flying and leaving my children. However by this time he had my heart, so I went. (love bombing)
The isolation may also be physical: you take them away from their normal milieu, friends, family, home. Give them the sense of being marginalized, in limbo-they are leaving one world behind and entering another. Once isolated like this, they have no outside support, and in their confusion they are easily lead astray. Lure the seduced into your lair, where nothing is familiar.
From then on it was him coming to see me in Canada every other month for two to three week. Then in July 2005 I flew to Germany and we spent 3 weeks driving from Germany through Austria, Switzerland, Italy, Paris, and then going on to the French Riviera. How could anyone who did this be married to someone else? (because he's a con man and had his first wife conned that he was away on 'secret missions.') I would have never guessed. (Exactly what he hoped. And he'd emotionally overwhelmed her so she never googled him or ran a background check. Another thing that the predators on all the online dating sites hope or ask you not to do. ALWAYS, ALWAYS CHECK THEM OUT - ESPECIALLY IF THEY SEEM TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!)
Familiarity and overexposure will cause this reaction. Remain elusive, then, so that when you are away, they will yearn to see you again, and will only associate you with pleasant thoughts. Occupy their minds by alternating an exciting presence with a cool distance, exuberant moments followed by calculated absences. Associate yourself with poetic images and objects, so that when they think of you, they begin to see you through an idealized halo. The more you figure in their minds, the more they will envelop you in seductive fantasies. Feed these fantasies by subtle inconsistencies and changes in your behavior.
He told me that his base was in Germany, and so that is where we would meet when he flew me somewhere to visit when he could not come here. He never stayed at my home, but always a hotel when he came to see me, as he said it was out of respect for my children. (trying to paint himself as ethical & moral - before he moved in for the kill - like they all do. Also gave him a chance to be alone and call or email his wife, all his other victims saying he was on a "secret mission" in Canada for the CIA. LOL!)
"Since psychopaths are chameleons, they pretend to be whatever their women are. They probably mimicked the women’s own moral principles.
By the end of the relationship, she was likely to have become mortified at his immoral behavior and how it took her down a negative path she never intended on."
Sandra Brown, MA - WOMEN WHO LOVE PSYCHOPATHS
Little did I know that his wife since 1995, Georgine, and her two sons (Nathan's step-children) Rickey -- 28 , and David -- 25 lived in Germany, and that he was nothing more than a retired, old, fat man who lied everytime he opened his mouth.
In September of 2005, he came to Canada and told me that the CIA would not let him leave, and that if we were married, they would be more acceptable to having him leave. He wanted to get married in a few days while he was here. It seemed a little rushed (they all RUSH you - with good reason - THEY HAVE AN AGENDA) But by this time he had me believing everything he told me. (BTW - Thomas married Georgine while he was STILL MARRIED to a woman named MARION who lives in Germany and who he has 2 children with. There was a divorce after the fact from Marion however -- the marriage to Georgine is also still BIGAMOUS!)
To keep women from being able to think things through and to respond to red flags, the psychopath induces fast paced relationships, whirlwinds of dating intensity, and uses emotional suffocation techniques. Most women found themselves unable to slow down the race to the altar, to their beds, or into their homes. Since psychopaths are extraverts, they are likely to be persistent (if not forceful) in their pursuit of women.After all, when he wasnt with me at my home, we were talking every morning afternoon and evening via internet. (you and numerous other women)“He really pursued me... The courtship was very short. Whirlwind trips, gifts and early on started calling me pet names as if we had been together forever. He... called me constantly, texted me, ...sent flowers to home and work, constant emails.”
While this may seem just “dream-like” to her, it’s pure manipulation and planning on his part. Couple his plan to fast-forward the relationship with his poor impulse control and you have a relationship rushing ahead at the speed of light.
Many women realized in retrospect that there was a “reason” the relationship was on the fast-track. The psychopath had a “need” to be filled whether that was needing a place to live, a business partner, or a sex partner - there was an agenda as to why the pacing of the relationship was so fast.
Some psychopaths even hid the motivation behind their fast paced relationship for other reasons...
Even her red flags often were not enough to put the brakes on the forceful momentum the psychopath had going.
Sandra Brown, MA - WOMEN WHO LOVE PSYCHOPATHS
In retrospect when he "said" he was in the United States, it was in emails. And he "said" he was" going to Iraq to work with Special Services." (Probably the same baloney he told his wife when he was off seeing you or other women. He went to see Victim #1 during this time too. See her story earlier in the month.)
After getting married, we went to Mexico for our honeymoon for 9 days. I know now he spent this time at the time share condominium that he and his first wife Georgine owned! (what a sick man!)
MORE TO COME!
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