Online Daters Burned by Lies

ONLINE DATING CAN BE DANGEROUS

An estimated 40 million Americans use online dating services hoping to meet "the one." There are more than 1,400 Web sites in the $700 million a year business, but some question their safety.

Prosecutors say a Philadelphia nursing student was conning women on match.com. He was convicted in 2007 of assault, but the accusations don't end there. His victims, described as attractive, ambitious professionals say their lives will never be the same.

Prosecutors said Jeffrey Marsalis, 34, told some tall tales, pretending to be a doctor, an astronaut and even a spy to lure women on Internet dating sites.

"He faces up to 20 years in prison and he will have to register as a sexual offender for the rest of his life," said prosecutor Joe Khan.

Marsalis was convicted of sexual assault. However, he was acquitted of more serious charges that he drugged and then raped seven women in his apartment.

"You read about it, you see it on TV but you just don't think it can happen to you," one anonymous victim said.

She said she knows about tricksters like Jeffrey Marsalis and how easy it is to be duped online. According to her, a man she met on a Christian dating Web site was seeing 60 other women from 25 different Web sites. He pretended to be everything from a country music manager to a Pentagon consultant. He even lied about having cancer, she said.

She claims he stole thousands of dollars from his victims.

"Mentally, it just about broke me to think that I had been so naive, when I don't consider myself to be a very naive person," she said. "And of course, I was worried about my safety." She may have good reason to be. Dozens of Internet dating cases have ended in tragedy. And experts said it's only getting worse.

"Men especially are getting are getting bolder as far as using dating Web sites to find their next victim," said Jayne Hitchcock, who is working to halt online abuse.

"Most of these women will tell you that they had a bad feeling about it but they went ahead with it because the person the man had a wonderful profile," Hitchcock said. "He was charming."

One victim said it was loneliness that clouded her judgment.

"Victims are victims because somebody is looking to exploit their weakness," she said. "And it doesn't matter if you're doctor. It doesn't matter if you're an accountant."

She said she wants women to trust their instincts because she didn't trust her own. About 35 percent of daters admit they lie about themselves online, according to a survey research study by Jeana Frost of Boston University and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. (Though the real number is probably MUCH higher!)

ORIGINAL ARTICLE

MATCH.com Strikes Again - Woman Raped on First Date

A woman who was brutally beaten and raped on a first date with a man she met on Match.com has testified about how she faced additional humiliation from defense attorneys who tried to use her Google searches as evidence against her.

Jennifer Bennett was 23-years-old when she was attacked in the apartment of Thomas Bray, a 37-year-old anesthesiologist, and she decided to go public following the attack in hopes of encouraging other sexual assault victims to report their attacks.

Though she expected to be questioned by police and interrogated by Bray's prominent attorney, she did not expect that they would try to use her own Google searches against her in an attempt to diminish the seriousness of the attack.

According to The Oregonian, Bray's lawyers ordered Ms Bennett to turn over her Google searches because they wanted to show that around the time of the February 2011 attack, Ms Bennett searched for the definition of rape. Defense attorneys believed that this would help support Bray's story that their sexual was rough but consensual, and Ms Bennett regretted it after the fact so she was looking for a way to argue her way out of it.

Victims advocates, however, decried the move. Meg Garvin, director of the National Crime Victim Law Institute said 'it's subjecting them to re-victimization by the system'. The filing for the search results was the first of its kind in Oregon, and though the both the county judge ruled that the order was justified and the state supreme court ruled that too much time had passed to appeal, the district attorney did not comply with the order.

Google also refused to turn over their user’s information as protected by the federal Electronic Communications Privacy Act unless she agreed, which she did not. In the end, Ms Bennett didn’t turn over her searches or her journals, but the sympathetic judge did not react with a contempt of court charge.‘I chose not to because I didn't think it was fair or correct,’ Ms Bennett told The Oregonian.

Instead of penalizing the victim, the jury sentenced Bray to spend the next 25 years in jail as he was found guilty of rape, sodomy, strangulation and assault.He was also facing charges that stem back to an alleged sexual assault of a prior girlfriend, but her claims were dismissed since the judge found them to be less valid because she continued to date him after the incident took place.

He will also have to pay a $112,000 fine, and $50,000 of that money will go the Ms Bennett, who moved to Oregon just months before the attack after accepting a job as a research chemist at Western Washington University.

Aside from the unusual invasion into Ms Bennett’s privacy, the story of the attack is becoming a disturbingly familiar trend as there have been many instances of sexual assaults during dates that came to fruition via online dating sites.

In Ms Bennett’s case, she met Bray at a drink at a bistro in downtown Bend, and they then went together to Bray’s condo which was directly across the street for a glass of wine.  Very soon after entering the condo, Ms Bennett was beaten, raped, and strangled until she passed out. She said that the abuse took place over the course of several hours.

After reporting the crime to police, she suffered scrutiny from both internet trolls and local news reporters, who published the police report and highlighted her bra size. She has since moved to Seattle.

‘Yes, I was raped. It doesn't make me a bad person. I didn't make poor choices. I was not the criminal,’ she told The Oregonian.  (Bray’s sentencing is) the one nugget that I could hold on to through all of this-- that a dangerous criminal will be off the streets.’

original article found here

INTERNET RAPIST ARRESTED

(GEORGIA, U.S.A.) Clayton County Police believe that there could be more victims of a man they say used the Internet to lure women and raped them.

Police arrested Jalyn Dwight Conner and charged him with multiple charges of rape, armed robbery, aggravated assault, burglary, false imprisonment and aggravated sodomy. Conner, 17, allegedly lured victims into a vacant apartment near his home and raped them.

Police are asking anyone who believe they may have been a victim of the College Park teenager to contact Clayton Police Detective Freeman at (770) 477-3624.

Sgt. Otis Willis said police are not releasing Conner’s photo nor the website he used to meet his alleged victims. “We do not want to reveal his face because there could possibly be more victims and showing his face could hinder our investigation,” said Willis. “We are not revealing which Internet site he used to meet his victims because any information that is presented by the victim needs to be unbiased.” According to warrants issued to Clayton County Police, Conner has denied involvement in the alleged attacks. Police said three women identified him from a photo line-up and items belonging to the alleged victims were found inside Conner’s home.

Willis said one victim was allegedly attacked raped on Aug. 12, during early morning hours, and another victim was allegedly attacked and raped around 6 a.m., on Aug. 23. The sergeant said both rapes took place near the Garden Walk Boulevard area.

Police linked Conner to the crimes after they searched Conner’s apartment and found items belonging to both women and a gun, ammunition as well as a holster, according to the warrant. A woman told police Conner called her that morning and invited her to his gated apartment complex on Riverdale Road in College Park to have sex with him. He allegedly gave her the gate code and told her to meet him at unit J6. Police said Conner lives in the same building but that J6 is vacant.

The woman told police she met Conner about 9:30 a.m. inside the unit, which she said was dark and void of furniture. Once inside, the woman told police, Conner put a gun to her head and said, “You know what this is.” The woman said Conner took her purse and phone and made her undress. She said he zip-tied her hands together and raped her. According to the warrant, Conner told her to stay inside the unit while he took her keys and went to her vehicle. The woman told police Conner stole $100, a camera, Coach bag and two cell phones from her vehicle. While Conner was outside, the woman said she was able to break the zip ties. When Conner returned, she said he got angry and allegedly raped her again. Afterward, he ran in an unknown direction and she drove to a nearby store and called police.

The woman was taken to Southern Regional Medical Center, where she was examined using a rape kit, according to the warrant. Police said a second complaint was made Aug. 23 against Conner, when another woman reported a similar attack in the same unit. Willis said women should take precautions when using any Internet site to meet people.

“If you meet someone over the Internet, it needs to be in a public place, just in case you need to make an outcry for help,” explained Willis. “You should inform a family member or friend where you are going and who you are meeting. Even if they could provide a name, an e-mail address or a phone number for the person they are going to meet.” Clayton County Police Chief Gregory Porter is grateful for all of the Clayton County residents who are assisting police in the Internet rape cases, Willis said.

“He wants them to remember the key to making Clayton County a better place to live is by citizens getting involved in their community,” continued the sergeant. “Our partnership with citizens is based on community-oriented policing.” Conner is being held without bond in the Clayton County Jail. He is due back in court Sept. 7 for bond reconsideration.

original article found here

Malicious Exes - More Horrible in the Internet Age

by Kashmir Hill

After a break-up, it’s natural to feel hurt and angry. Hopefully you and your ex are able to vent those painful emotions by talking to friends, eating copious amounts of ice cream, taking up new hobbies, spending hours at the gym to negate the ice cream eating, and/or meticulously cutting each other out of one another’s digital lives through de-friending, deletion and detagging. Let’s hope your ex finds a healthy way to deal with his pain and doesn’t decide to go down the dark path taken by Shawn Sayer of Maine. After he and his girlfriend split in 2006, he harassed her for years, notably by crowd-sourcing his revenge. A court order from Judge Brock Hornby describes how he kept up his harassment after his ex moved to a new state in 2009:

[A]fter Sayer’s former girlfriend changed her name and moved from Maine to Louisiana to escape him, the defendant Sayer, still in Maine, created fictitious internet advertisements and social media profiles using [the victim's] name and other identifying information. The fictitious internet postings included [the victim's] address and invited men to come to her home for sexual encounters.

He wasn’t doing this to help her meet new people and start afresh. According to The Courier, these postings were in the “casual encounters” section of Craigslist, and included a photo of Sayer’s ex, “directions to her house and a list of sexual things she would do when interested individuals arrived.” Sayer didn’t stop there. According to the court order, he also “engaged in chats and e-mails with prospective sexual partners, while posing as his ex-girlfriend.” And you thought your ex was bad…

Sayer avoided getting caught, reported the Portland Press Herald in 2010, by “connecting to unsecured wireless networks at different locations… That way, when police issued subpoenas for Internet records after a fake personal ad was posted, the trail dead-ended at the owner of the wireless network.” From the court document:

The Defendant also posted video clips to several adult pornography websites depicting sexual acts [the victim] had consensually performed with him during their relationship. The Defendant edited the clips so they also displayed [the victim's] name and actual address. As a result of the Defendant’s actions, numerous men arrived at [the victim's] Louisiana residence seeking sexual encounters, terrifying her and causing her to fear that she would be raped or assaulted.

Luckily, Sayer’s ex was not assaulted (though she was groped one time). Another woman subject to this sort of treatment by an ex was not so lucky. A spurned former Marine took revenge on his ex-girlfriend by posting a “rape fantasy ad” to Craigslist on her behalf. A 27-year-old Wyoming man answered the ad for “a real aggressive man with no concern for woman.” Thinking he was corresponding with her (rather than her ex), he thought he had her consent when he went to her home and raped her. (Eek!) Both the ex and the fantasy fulfiller were sentenced to 60 years in prison in that case.

Since Sayer’s ex was not ultimately attacked, Sayer got off a little easier. Law enforcement finally tracked him down by getting their hands on surveillance video taken in areas where he connected to wireless networks that didn’t require passwords. In 2010, he was sentenced to 22 months for violating a protective order. But prosecutors also want to go after him for the federal crimes of interstate cyberstalking and identity theft (because he posted social media profiles posing as his ex).

Sayer tried to get the cyberstalking charge dismissed, pointing to a recent case that established our constitutional right to harass people on Twitter, which privileged a cyberstalker William Lawrence Cassidy’s right to free speech over a Buddhist leader Alyce Zeoli’s right to be free from harassment. Cassidy had criticized Zeoli’s looks, criticized Buddhism, described cinematic ways that Zeoli could die, and told her to commit suicide. A judge ruled that Zeoli was a public figure and that she could have avoided harassment by simply not looking at Cassidy’s tweets.

The judge in the Sayer case doesn’t think the cases are comparable, though, because Zeoli was a public figure (while Sayer’s ex is not) and because he was simply harassing his ex, not exercising speech worth protecting.

“What Sayer is alleged to have done involves no political or religious speech or the promotion of ideas of any sort,” writes Judge Hornby. “Instead, everything that Sayer allegedly said was ‘integral to criminal conduct,’ his criminal conduct seeking to injure, harass or cause substantial emotional distress to the victim.”

Thus, Sayer’s federal case will move forward. If convicted, he faces up to 15 years in prison.

My friends, try not to let ‘obsessing’ over your ex enter criminal territory.

H/T Eric Goldman

original article found here

Another Woman Raped by Person She Met Online

By Leon Watson

Internet daters have been warned after a legal secretary was raped by a man she met on a popular dating website.

Peter Ramsey, 26, beat the woman to the ground, ripped off her tights and had sex with her when she refused him a goodnight kiss at her front door. Ramsey punched the 27-year-old repeatedly knocking out one of her front teeth and left her with 21 injuries. Her facial wounds were among the most shocking detectives investigating the case had ever seen.

The sex attacker was caught after using the victim's Oyster travelcard to board a nightbus within minutes of the attack in Clapham, south west London.

Ramsey and the woman had spent four days chatting on plentyoffish.com site which claims on its homepage to be 'responsible for more dates and more relationships than any other dating site'. They arranged to meet for drinks in Brixton town centre at 7pm.

She later said: 'He seemed like a nice guy. The date was going very well. I thought we had a lot in common.' In the early hours of August 27 last year they went for something to eat before climbing into a cab to her flat near Clapham Common. She believed he was going to walk her to her front door but when he lent in for a kiss and she pulled back, he 'switched'.

In the communal entrance to the block, he pinned her against the wall and rained down punches on her face until she slumped to the ground. When she screamed for help he used one hand to cover her mouth and pinch her nose shut, while continuing to hit her with the other fist. 'I thought I was going to die,' she told Inner London Crown Court.


A 'SEVERE RISK' TO WOMEN

Outside court DC Huggins praised the SOIT role which was crucial in securing the conviction. He said of the result: 'I feel relieved that somebody like Ramsey who had access via the internet to so many women, is now safely behind bars.

'He posed a severe risk to other women on that internet site, which he had been using for a number of years. I would urge people using dating websites to thoroughly vet the people they meet and before they spend time alone. I would also like to thank my SOIT officer, who had the initial contact with the victim. I would like to reassure other potential victims that there are people who are willing to listen to them and take their allegations very seriously in order to bring the perpetrator to justice.

'The victim in this case is relieved about the verdict. She was also concerned for other women and that if he had walked free, there would have been other victims. This woman was unrecognisable after the attack, compared to the woman who gave evidence. Fortunately she has recovered from her physical injuries. I have been in the police for 14 years and these were some of the most shocking facial injuries I have ever seen.'

Ramsey, who has several previous convictions for shoplifting and assaulting police officers, but none for violence or sexual offences against women, then stole the bleeding woman's bag.

As he left she staggered to her feet and called to a passing man, a Muslim on his way to Ramadan prayers, and he came to her aid. The victim's mother, who had heard the screams, also rushed out to find her disfigured and traumatised daughter.

In a further insult, before Ramsey fled, he said to the pedestrian of the two women: 'Don't worry about them - they're crazy.' The rapist then used the woman's stolen Oyster card on a passing N35 bus.

The following day he left two voicemails on the victim's mobile telling her he was sorry and had now sobered up. He said he was left feeling something had happened that 'wasn't good'.

Soon after her ordeal the woman was interviewed by a specialist SOIT (Sexual Offences Interview Technique) officer from Lambeth's Sapphire Unit. PC Damien Hutton-Baber worked closely with the victim to get her detailed account, an interview which was filmed and played to the jury to reduce her time in the witness box.

Ramsey was arrested a week after the attack when a DNA match appeared to have snared him. But when he lied he had not even met the woman on that day, officers were forced to dig deeper. DC Richard Huggins, the officer in charge of the investigation, examined CCTV footage from the bus which showed him on board near the scene.

Ramsey continued to deny the rape, changing his story at trial. He put forward the defence he had consensual sex with the woman but left her rowing with another man who must have beat her.

Ramsey boasted said he had been out with 'hundreds of women' and did not need to rape because he could get anyone he wanted. But he was found unanimously guilty following a trial.

Ramsey, of no fixed address but who had been staying with friends in Forest Hill, south east London, was convicted of rape, wounding with intent to cause grievous bodily harm and theft.

Following the verdicts Judge Patricia Lees said: 'I would like an assessment of the defendant's future risk that he may pose to women. It seems to me the violence meted out was frankly horrific and wholly unnecessary to commit the offence of rape.'

Remanding him in custody ahead of sentence on April 27, Judge Lees warned him: 'You face an extremely lengthy sentence of imprisonment.' The court heard Ramsey has been diagnosed as biopolar while on remand.

original article here

Another Rape Tied to Social Network Meeting

State police are investigating the claims of a Hempfield Township (PA, USA) woman who says she was drugged and raped by two men after meeting one of them on the Internet.

State police in Greensburg have not charged the suspects and are not releasing their names, but are seeking more information about the incident Aug. 27 in the woman's home about 30 miles east of Pittsburgh.

The 51-year-old woman told police she e-mailed one of the men after meeting him on a Web site called "Tagged" and agreed to let him visit.

The man brought along a friend and they all drank beer and hard liquor.

The woman woke up sore, sick, disoriented with some of her clothes on backward and believes she was assaulted after a drug was put in her drink.

original article here

IN THE NEWS: Craigslist Rapist/ Man Shot by Online Date

Police Search For Craigslist Serial Rapist
Six Cases Possibly Linked In Maryland

Police in Maryland said they are concerned that a man who meets women on the Internet and then rapes them will strike again.

Police said the man used Craigslist personal ads to meet and sexually assault several women.

Authorities said the man has raped at least six women.

Investigators said the man meets women through the online classifieds site, sets up a meeting and then rapes them, police said.

The attacker usually wears a ski mask and is armed with a handgun, police said.

Investigators said the victims were attacked inside different buildings in Temple Hills and Suitland.

The most recent incident happened on Tuesday. Police said they were called to the 9100 block of Baltimore Avenue in College Park by a woman who said she had been sexually assaulted.

Investigators said the woman told them she met a man online and agreed to meet at an apartment in Suitland.

When the woman arrived at the apartment building, a man was waiting in the hallway, police said.

The woman said she was raped at gunpoint, and afterward the man fled, according to police.

The investigation is ongoing.

ORIGINAL
~~~~~~~~~~~
Ohio man shot by woman he met through online dating service, police say

A Mentor man is recovering from at least five bullet wounds after he was shot by a woman he met on an online dating site on Thursday night, police said.

Michael Kufrin, 19, is at MetroHealth Medical Center in Cleveland in serious condition with bullet wounds to his arm, knee and hip.

Eastlake Police Lt. Bill Gutowski said Kufrin met Leechelle Brown, 29, of Eastlake, on an Internet chat room and was supposed to go on a date.

According to police this is what happened:

Kufrin went to Brown's Vine Street apartment about 7 p.m. Thursday and she demanded he pay her $300. She pulled out a gun, then forced him to take off his shoes and go to a local bank to withdraw the $300 from an ATM.

They returned to her apartment and another argument followed and Brown emptied her gun.

Police recovered seven shell casings.

Kufrin knocked on several neighbors doors before someone called 911 for help. He was taken to LakeWest Hospital in Willoughby and later transferred to MetroHealth.

Police have not yet determined what chat room he met her on or why she demanded the cash.

Brown is in Lake County Jail and faces a felonious assault charge as well as other charges.

ORIGINAL

TWO SEX CONVICTIONS IN ONLINE DATING CASE

(Philadelphia, PA) A man who told dates he met online tall tales of being a doctor, an astronaut and a CIA assassin was convicted Wednesday of two counts of sexual assault but acquitted of raping several women who accused him of drugging them.

Seven women, six of whom Jeffrey J. Marsalis met through the Match.com dating service, told similar stories of blacking out or becoming unusually intoxicated during dates from 2003 to 2005.

The jury reached its verdict on the fifth day of deliberations that were so contentious jurors were overheard shouting at each other earlier in the week. He was acquitted of eight rape counts and a count of impersonating a public servant.

Marsalis could get up to 20 years in prison for the two sexual assault counts at sentencing, set for Sept. 18.

"We're pleased that the jury recognized that Mr. Marsalis is not the wrongly
accused man he claimed to be," prosecutor Joseph Khan said. "He is a criminal. He is a sex offender."

The jury could not reach a verdict on one rape count. Prosecutors had not decided whether to seek a second trial on that charge.

Prosecutors said Marsalis, 34, of Philadelphia, was a smooth talker with a tony address and a penchant for chic bars and restaurants. The on-and-off nursing student spun tales about being a doctor, an astronaut or a secret agent.

The women, most of them well-educated professionals, gave authorities similar accounts of meeting Marsalis and then feeling unusually intoxicated after returning from the bathroom or letting him buy a round of drinks from the bar. They testified they woke up hours later at his apartment — groggy, sometimes undressed — after an apparent sexual encounter or even amid intercourse.

Marsalis' lawyer said the women were suffering from "buyer's remorse" after being duped about his accomplishments and dumped after consensual sex. Defense attorney Kathleen E. Martin said none of the victims went to police or a hospital afterward and were only sought out by police as part of an earlier case against Marsalis. (typical "scorned women" defense used by cyberpaths)

Marsalis was acquitted of three similar assaults in January 2006 and immediately charged in the latest cases. Another rape charge is pending against him in Sun Valley, Idaho.

Records show Marsalis has moved frequently, having lived in Park City, Utah; the Phoenix area, where he worked as a paramedic; a Seattle suburb; and South Florida.

ORIGINAL POST HERE

Hat Tip to EOPC Group Member "MaryAnn" for this story