Saturday, November 14, 2009

eHarmony Promoting Casual Sex Hookups

J.P. and Amanda Duffy expose dating service's encouragement of 'one-night stands'
online dating

..excerpts (Think Online Dating is "safe"? THINK AGAIN!)

Wednesday evening, a friend called expressing dismay about eHarmony's most recent e-newsletter which included an article, "Navigating the one-night stand." Our friend read the first few lines: "So you're a swinging single, and you've had a one-night stand. What's the etiquette for establishing boundaries, calling the day after and getting out without hurting feelings?"

Promoting such high-risk, promiscuous behavior is outrageous and irresponsible.

The advice column glosses over the risks of sexually transmitted diseases. In flippantly urging readers to "always use protection," the columnist ignores the ugly realties of "one night stands." The Center for Disease Control reports that sexually transmitted diseases are at epidemic proportions in this country, with 19 million new infections added every year. The consequences of an STD infection range from infertility to impaired reproductive health.

Also glossed over is the increased risk for violence among those who "navigate" multiple sexual partners. The article states, "It's true you can't spot an ax murderer just by talking to him, but it's a good sign if you are comfortable with someone in the light before deciding to dance in the dark." Does anyone really believe that "talking in the light" is enough to sufficiently reduce this high risk of dating violence?
What the column doesn't report is that sexually active females are five times more likely to be victimized by dating violence than girls who are abstinent.

Several years ago, Dr. Neil Clark Warren, founder of eHarmony, was closely associated with Focus on the Family. He separated from the organization after deciding to expand his services to the wider market. However, "Navigating the One Night Stand" takes this a step further by completely breaking eHarmony away from its Christian, pro-marriage beginnings.
After 24 hours, the article was removed from the eHarmony website. However, this will do little to undo the damage to their reputation. How did the advice column get there in the first place? It was clearly an intentional element of a well-designed newsletter, complete with a graphic of a tousled couple in bed together.
eHarmony can make amends by issuing a full retraction, an apology and an explanation of how this occurred. At minimum, this e-newsletter represents gross negligence. The apology should also be sent to all e-newsletter recipients.

eHarmony has assisted thousands of couples in building strong marriages. However, this goes beyond eHarmony's corporate reputation. A full retraction and reaffirmation of their mission will signal that eHarmony will remain an ally of millions of couples who endeavor to build strong marriages in the face of a culture that degrades marriage and family.
However, eHarmony's silence would signal something entirely different. A failure to retract will lead many to believe that eHarmony sees this as a minor issue and is open to "navigating" its readers into such risky territory again in the future.

Let's hope they realize that their standards should be compatible with the morals and values of their members.


Who wants to bet that eHarmony does it again? And other sites will or are doing the same! EOPC does not condone online dating or ANY online dating site in ANY way, shape or form.

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