For several months I had noticed a change in his behavior. He was swinging between being utterly charming to downright mean. (the REAL him) He was saying and doing things that eroded my self esteem and confidence which cut through the heart of who I am as a person. He became unreliable about making our regular meetings online and although I would often see him online on my messenger he wouldn't answer my IM's. When challenged he would say it wasn't him but Yahoo. It just happened too often.
(Typical. Dorsky, Gridney/ Yidwithlid, Thomas, Clive, Jacoby - all did/ do the same thing. For Narcissists this is called the "DEGRADE & DISCARD" phase when they get bored with you, blame you, project all the bad onto you and leave - making you feel like crap in the process. This is who they really are. They were just using you for sex & an ego boost. To them people are just OBJECTS which is why the internet is such a fertile HUNTING GROUND for them!)
We had arranged a holiday in Spain to visit some friends of mine. He left his beaten up old address book on the bedside table, I had bought him a new one the previous Christmas and was curious as to why he wasn't using it. I opened it up, took a look and found names, phone numbers and internet id's of ladies. I wrote a couple of the phone numbers down and then challenged him but he denied everything saying these were women he had called before he met me. I had also given him a cellphone to use in Europe and I noticed he was getting lots of voicemails... he always left the room to listen to them which was a big red flag. (Nathan Thomas did this too. A HUGE red flag.)
I packed my bags, told him our relationship was over and left to return home. On arrival back in the UK I contacted a man I knew in the USA and he called the numbers listed in the address book pretending to be a friend of John Gash. The first call was to **** ***** an engineer who worked in the same company. She told him that they (Gash & she) "hooked up" as often as possible. This woman had been a bone of contention with me for some time as she was always leaving him messages when he was with me in the UK and I had seen emails from her. When questioned he told me she called to tell him about contracts they had won. It was strange to me that they always won these contracts when he was overseas with me, so the fact that she admitted they hooked up pretty much confirmed everything I believed.
I left John a voicemail telling him to come to Yahoo messenger as I needed to talk to him. I then confronted him with what I knew. He denied and denied until I told him I would let his child know what type of man their Father was. At that point his cover was about to be blown so he tried to buy my silence by telling me he loved me; that he didn't want this to end; that it had been my decision to end it, not his and he couldn't bear not talking to me again. (Gridney/ Yidwithlid did the same telling his victims he "couldn't lose them out of" his "life." Now 4 years later, this same person attacks his victims and threatens them.
Nathan Thomas told one of his wives that it was "all her fault" because she didn't believe him & stand by him... when he'd BLATANTLY LIED to her. Can't these predators think of anything better? Like the TRUTH?)
I told him he had earned nothing from me and I would not promise him anything. He then admitted sleeping with AT LEAST three women simultaneously. When I told him it was still my intention to still notify his family he became angry, aggressive and ugly. I told him I would need to take an HIV test and advised him to do the same and that, if it was found to be positive I would sue the pants off him. He told me he would take an HIV test for HIS protection only. (Of course ALL about him)
One week later he emailed to say his HIV test was negative which was total BS as two tests are required with a time frame between them even then he was blatantly lying. (Yes, HIV tests require a lot of time. Campbell tried to do this to his victim, too) I am an R.N. and yet he was still trying to B.S. me!
I still have the whole of this conversation printed out and in safekeeping so, should he wish to challenge this expose or threaten a lawsuit he will need to first find the safe deposit box its kept in as it can be used in evidence.
Two years later I went into a Yahoo chatroom and noticed the id Wheelies03 talking in the room. I just knew it was him even though it wasn't an id I knew or had heard before. I got a friendgf to IM him and and he gave her his name and cellphone number. She emailed me the conversation and I sent it right back to him. Immediately the id Wheelies03 was deleted. (BUSTED!) I am certain he is still out there as this has become addictive behavior.
(These guys never change!
"Pathology Is The Inability To:Let's take a look at some of our past predators:
- SANDRA BROWN, MA."
- change and sustain a change
- grow to any emotional depth and
- develop meaningful insight about one's own behavior and how it effects others."
- Ed Hicks is still trolling as Charles Hicks or someone else.
- William Barber was rearrested for leaving the state of his probation with false ID on him... on his way to do the same thing over!
- "Gridney" changed his nick to Yidwithlid, deleted all his posting about his romps with hookers; though they remain on archival searches, and he has a new political blog under that name as well as being on instant messengers under Yidwithlid 24/7 - despite saying he & his wife "worked it out," and saying he had deleted all his IM programs. ha!
- Beckstead and his proxies are still checking sites like this one and Beckstead tried to reel in his victim this past Christmas while probably working over other victims at the same time.
- Jacoby is now trying to paint his victim as a "whore" and a "crazy woman" (heard that before haven't we, reader?) and is attacking her after using her and taking her time, money and love; for standing up for herself. And he's most probably online now with at least 1 or 2 new targets!
- to keep others from falling for their traps and
- on the outside chance it will be a wake up call for them to get help!
I have had no contact with him since and acknowledge that this man has been doing this for years and getting away with it. I was just one of his many victims.
He once told me several times about a fellow employee at his job who attempted to bring a sexual harrassment case at work and he was required to make a deposition. The employee had to leave her job and was moved from California to another state by the company. I now recognise that the harrassment suit was probably against him and telling me about it was almost like bragging that he had won again.
With this expose I have done all I can to forewarn other women and shown him that he cannot treat me in the way he did and expect me not to stand up for myself. I have exposed him on behalf of all his previous victims and the lady who lost her job. I am much, much stronger than he will ever know.Thank you Fighter for this website and for allowing us a voice to tell our stories.
Incidentally when I met John Gash for the first time in reality I met him sight unseen, not even a photo. My first reaction on seeing him was "There is noooooooo way anything is going to happen here." I am still to this day wondering how it did. I should have listened to my intuition. (Brainwashing. That's how. Subtle, covert NLP manipulation & brainwashing.)
Today I looked up the word GASH in the dictionary... the definition was:
tr.v. gashed, gash·ing, gash·es
To make a long deep cut in; slash deeply.
That about sums it up!
You're welcome! And KUDOS to you for exposing him and showing others the type of patterns and tricks that these predators use on vulnerable, trusting and good people online.