Cyberpaths Have Narcissistic Characteristics

(EOPC believes Cyberpaths have both Narcissistic and Sociopathic Characteristics. Many of them probably suffer from either or both Personality Disorders.

Yours does not need to have all these to be Narcissistic. A handful will suffice.)

• Self-centered. His needs are paramount. No one else’s count.
• No remorse for abuse, outbursts, mistakes or misdeeds. EVER.
• Unreliable, undependable. And often proud of it.
• Does not care about the consequences of his actions.
• Projects his faults on to others. High blaming behavior; never his fault. Blame and projection are primary M.O.
• Little if any conscience or ability to empathize with others.
• Insensitive to needs and feelings of others, especially his intimate partner(s).
• Has a good front (persona) to impress and exploit others. Jekyll/Hyde personality ie: public vs private behavior with partner. OTHERS often believe the front/social “Jekyll” personality and think he’s Mr. Wonderful. This serves to isolate and discredit the victim’s experience so that no one will believe he’s abusive with HER even if she tells them.
• Low stress tolerance. Easy to anger and rage. Explodes when frustrated.
• Tends to humiliate his partner(s) in public or in front of friends/neighbors.
• People are to be manipulated for his needs.
• Twists conversation to his gain at other’s expense. If trapped, keeps talking, changes the subject, blames others/his partner, or gets angry and verbally abusive. It’s NEVER his fault. He’s ALWAYS right – and perfectly innocent if there are any issues. Tries to paint himself as an “innocent bystander” or "the victim" and blames others for the issue.
• Pathological lying – often by omission.
• Tremendous need to control situations, conversations, others.
• No real values. Mostly situational. Abhors ANY request to change abusive or inconsiderate behavior in the relationship no matter WHAT he does to his partner in any situation. Will say he doesn’t want to follow any “rules” and will accuse his partner of trying to “control” him if she asks for even basic common consideration or respect.
• Often perceived as caring and understanding and uses this to manipulate.
• Angry, mercurial, moods, sudden outbursts, that he ‘forgets’ immediately, wants to ignore, or outright denies when confronted with them.
• Uses sex to control – either excessively demanding or withholding, or holds the prospect of sex with other partners over current partner’s head as a control mechanism, manufactures stories about other women who “want” him then accuses his current partner of being “insecure”. Sets her up for abuse in this fashion.
• Does not share ideas, feelings, emotions.
• Conversation controller. Must have the first and last word.
• Is very slow to forgive others. Hangs onto resentments. Continues to abuse partner over resentments indefinitely via hostile remarks, denigrating jokes. Continually either covertly or overtly angry and abusive.
• Secret life. Hides money, friends, activities, both online and off.
• Likes annoying others. Likes to create chaos and disrupt for no reason, particularly in his partner’s life and in his relationship with her both public and private – to keep her ‘off balance’. Then he denigrates HER as “unstable”. Sets her up for abuse in this fashion.
• Moody – switches from nice guy to anger without much provocation.
• Repeatedly fails to honor financial obligations, but expects others to honor theirs if they owe him money.
• Does a lot of “nice things” that his partner didn’t ask him to do then complains that she isn’t appreciative enough afterwards. “The Controlling Caretaker“.
• Seldom expresses appreciation himself. Conversation always based on whether HE gets enough appreciation, the issue of whether his partner is appreciated enough is never discussed. To him, that is irrelevant. It’s all about HIM.
• Constantly criticizing most everything his partner does/says and how / why she does and says it. Partner feels like she’s “walking on eggshells” trying to avoid his constant criticism. She feels “under his microscope” all the time.
• Calls his partner names and insults her: “You’re a spoiled brat!”, “You’re lazy!”, "You're stupid/ a pig/ a whore/ a liar/ a stalker/ a scorned woman/ insane!"
  
• Grandiose. Convinced he knows more than others and is correct in all he does. HE is NEVER wrong.
• Lacks ability to see how he comes across to others. Defensive when confronted with his behavior. Never his fault.
• Only real emotion he is likely to display is anger. Rarely expresses sorrow or hurt except for “show”.
• He breaks a woman’s spirit. Sets her up for abuse. Defines her according to HIS very negative and preconceived notions about women, then abuses her based on HIS definitions of her. Tears her down as a person. Then complains that she is “depressed” or “angry” about that as if she has no right to be angry or upset that she is being ABUSED and mentally RAPED in this fashion.
• Needs threats, intimidations to keep others close to him.
• Sabotages partner. Wants her to be happy only through him and to have few or no outside interests and acquaintances. Puts her friends/interests and accomplishments down.
• Highly contradictory.
• Convincing. Must convince people to side with him.
• Hides his real self. Always “on”.
• Kind only if he’s getting from you what he wants.
• He has to be right. He has to win. He has to look good. He will do so at all costs.This is paramount.
• He announces, not discusses. He tells, not asks. He asserts / states his opinion as FACT, never says “I think”, or “I feel”.
• Does not discuss openly, has a hidden agenda.
• Controls money of others or complains about their spending but spends freely on himself.
• Unilateral condition of, “I’m OK and justified so I don’t need to hear your position or ideas”.
• Always feels misunderstood.
• You feel miserable with this person. He drains you.
• Does not listen because he does not care.
• Only his feelings are discussed, not his partner’s because to him, partner’s feelings are irrelevant.
• Is not interested in problem-solving, only in placing blame/projecting.
• Very good at reading people, only so he can manipulate them.

Written with male in mind; could easily be applied to females as well

original post found here

Stalking & Googling Someone 40,000 Times = 16 Weeks in Jail

By Arthur Martin

An ‘obsessive’ TV producer who stalked a former classmate for more than seven years was jailed for just 16 weeks on Monday.

Elliot Fogel, 34, subjected Claire Waxman to an ‘unimaginable’ ordeal by following her, breaking into her car and making hundreds of late-night phone calls to her home.

A search of his computer revealed he had Googled his victim more than 40,000 times in one year. But despite a judge ruling that Fogel’s actions had caused ‘mental harm’ to his victim, a police source revealed that he could be free in as little as six weeks.

Mrs. Waxman, 34, a complementary therapist from North-West London, attacked the sentence as too short and called for tougher jail terms in stalking cases.

‘I will get a couple of months’ respite at best, but I am under no illusion that he will be out of jail soon and the harassment will start again,’ she said. ‘What we are looking at here is an obsessive person who is highly likely to reoffend.

'There is currently not an appropriate sentence for stalking. This obsession started 20 years ago and it’s not going to suddenly stop after a few weeks in jail.’

Wood Green Crown Court in North London heard how Fogel – a freelance producer at Sky Sports News and Capital Radio – first developed an unhealthy interest in Mrs Waxman while they were students at a college in St Albans, Hertfordshire.

She repeatedly told Fogel to leave her alone and, after leaving college in 1993, heard nothing more from him. However, ten years later, she received a dinner invitation from him, which she declined.

A few months later, in December 2003, Fogel, from Isleworth, West London, was spotted jogging on the spot outside her home and also began to spend increasing amounts of time hanging around her workplace.

Mrs Waxman told the court she felt ‘like a sitting duck’ as Fogel continued to follow her and make phone calls to her home.

After his arrest, a police search of his computer revealed he had also managed to get hold of Mrs Waxman’s wedding photographs and had a Google Earth aerial map of her home.

Further investigation found that he had paid for background searches to be carried out on Mrs Waxman’s husband Marc and her father, and that he had posed as a prospective parent at the nursery her daughter attended.

Jailing Fogel for 16 weeks after he admitted breaching a restraining order, Judge Fraser Morrison said:

‘Mrs Waxman wants some peace from you because you weren’t able to take the hint that any relationship you wanted with her was not going to take place.

‘You’re not an unintelligent man but you didn’t take the hint. She wants you out of her life.’

In a 16-page written impact statement to the court, Mrs Waxman described how she had suffered a miscarriage, developed an eating disorder, and had to move home five times as a result of her seven-year ordeal.

‘He has nothing in his life and all he chooses to do is pursue me and my family,’ she wrote. ‘Though there has been no physical harm, the mental harm of all these years is getting too heavy to bear.

‘My life has been ruined by this man in so many ways and yet no one can help us nor protect us.

'Instead of preventing something terrible from happening, I feel like we’re being left like sitting ducks waiting for something to happen.

‘He has said time and time again that he will leave me alone and yet never does. He still feels he is allowed to do what he wants because he has no moral compass.

‘He has no respect for me, my family, the law and I feel not even himself. Fogel is mentally unwell and has an obsession with me – he needs medical attention.’

Police have been unable to take tough action against Fogel because he has not made any physical threats to his victim. It means that officers have been able to use only anti-harassment laws to curb his campaign.

original article here