Turning to the Net for Revenge

EOPC wants to remind all members and readers: 

• We are NOT a REVENGE site. 
• We do not follow around our exposed predators and harass them.  
• We do not hack.
• We are not legal or police help. 
• We purposely do not take any personal interest in anyone. 

Postings come from those who contact us and we make clear this site is not about personal revenge. We simply give victims a platform.

We are about reporting, education, safe internet use and treating others honestly -- even online.
We do these stories to show the patterns and pathology of net abusers as well as the downside of looking for love, friendship or money online.

REVENGE hurts everyone... and here's a good (bad) example:

By Beth Hale

(U.K.)When Richard Bradford suspected his nurse girlfriend of having an affair he subjected her to the ultimate revenge.

Furious that Shivanthi Panchalingam had allegedly cheated on him, he sent a naked picture of the ward sister to everyone in her email address book.

Miss Panchalingam, who works at the Royal Berkshire Hospital, in Reading, only learned of the humiliating betrayal when a friend called to say he had seen one of the photographs.

The couple had taken the risque photographs of one and other to spice up their love life after becoming a couple in August last year but Bradford used them against the nurse after their relationship broke down.

The nurse spoke of her distress as George faced court charged with harassment.

In a statement, read out by the prosecution, she said:

'My friend Steven received a picture of me naked. You could see my front and the photos were detailed. I have not seen any of the others.

'I find it very distressing and cannot bear to look at them. He sent them to my whole address book.'

'I am embarrassed to say the least. I am a ward sister; people work below me and I am worried about my career credibility.

'I have been unable to cope with this anymore.'

As well as the photographs, Reading Magistrates' Court heard how Bradford, 37, had called Miss Panchalingam up to 40 times a week at work.

Bradford, of Glynde Road, Brighton, East Sussex, initially denied harassing Miss Panchalingam, but later changed his plea.

Simon Hammudi, defending, said: 'My client is sorry about his behaviour and says it was unreasonable and has not had any contact with the victim since the allegation.'

Valerie Boddington, presiding magistrate, handed him a one-year community order, a supervision order of nine months and ordered him pay the victim £200 in compensation and £100 costs.

Bradford also had a restraining order placed on him to have no contact directly or indirectly with Miss Panchalingam and prohibited him from going within 200 yards of the hospital unless for a medical appointment or emergency.

It's not the first time that e-mail has been used to enact revenge, nor the first time that naked photographs have come back to haunt the person posing for them. Four years ago a jilted boyfriend was jailed after setting up a website with naked pictures and film of his former lover.

He then printed business cards giving the web address and handed them out at her 21st birthday party, posted them through her neighbours' letterboxes and gave them to her work colleagues.

It is not just men who use humiliation as revenge. A survey found that eight out of ten women would take revenge on a partner who dumped them - with most using the internet and email to get even.

SOURCE

HOW CAN YOU TELL IF THEY ARE LYING?

Did you know that Online Dating is the top moneymaker on the Web? Chances are good that you have joined a site or two yourself. If so, you've probably asked the top three questions my CyberRomance clients all do:

"Why don't they answer my emails?"
"How do I tell them about ___?" - you fill in the blank.
"How can you tell if they are lying?"

"Why don't they answer my emails?" You'll never know, but rudeness is a pretty good guess. Say "Thank you" to cyberspace for weeding out inconsiderate candidates so quickly!

"How do I tell them about ___?" Just about everyone has something they are ashamed of others knowing and worried about how to break the news. This question takes time and finesse for the best solution -- and usually there IS a good solution! A Romance Coach could help if you are really stumped.

Much of the problem of Internet lying is media over hype. What kind of interest would there be in a story about all the honest people who are on the Net?

But of course some people do lie, and being concerned about who is and who isn't lying makes a heck of a lot of sense.

"How can you tell if they are lying?" Count the ways:

Reasons people lie:
To avoid conflict.
To avoid the consequences of their behavior.
To postpone having to make changes in lifestyle.
To hide something they did or did not do.
To avoid rejection.
To be in control of a situation.
To avoid being embarrassed.
To make themselves appear more successful, good, or talented than they really are.
All make terrific reasons for people to lie online.

How to detect lying:
A truthful person will be "congruent." That means that all the information they give out -- their words, body language, they way they live and dress, everything -- fits together and contains no contradictions. People who lie will be incongruent in some way.

Here's what to watch out for:
1. How they use words, written, on the phone, or in person:
Talking faster or slower.

Changes in voice pitch.

Taking charge of conversation, attempts to distract you.

Continual denying of accusations.

Unusual voice fluctuations, word choice, sentence structure.

Stalling the conversation by repetitive use of pauses and comments like "um" or "you know."

Lack of use of contractions.

Prefers emphasizing "not" when talking.

Being extremely defensive.

Saying "Trust me" or "this is a True Story"


2. How they behave or the attitudes they exhibit:
Being hesitant.

Nervous laughter.

Smugness.

Uncommon calmness.

Providing more information and specifics than is necessary or was asked for.

Inconsistencies in what is being shared.

3. In-person behavior clues:
Touching chin, covering the mouth, or rubbing brows.

Crossed arms or legs.

Pupils narrow.

Playing with hair.

Body language and facial expressions don't match what is being said such as saying "no", but nodding head up and down.

Avoidance of eye contact, eyes glancing to the right, staring past you or down, or turning away from you while they are talking.

Rigid or fidgeting.

Slouching posture.

Unnatural or limited arm and hand movements.

Partial shrug.

Lack of finger pointing.

May place a barrier such as a desk or chair in front of self.

Sweating, even if it isn't a warm day.

Saying "no" several times.

4. Your own inner cues:
You sense something is not right. Explanations do not feel enough for you. You feel confused, you find yourself squinting or angling your head. You feel a block or a wall between you and the other.

In Internet dating, or any kind of dating for that matter, keep your anxiety down, your head attached, and LISTEN to everything your date tells you in every way. People tell you about themselves constantly, from the very first second of contact. You just have to be willing to hear it. Not only do they tell you by what they do say, they tell you by what they don't say.

Many of these cues can come from simple distraction or nervousness, not deceit. New daters have plenty of reasons to be anxious. Signs of lying differ from one person to another. Don't let your own nervousness force a jump to wrong conclusions. Give your date a break and take some time.

Often, Cyber daters move too quickly to the phone and/or a face to face meeting. Gone is the golden opportunity to safely ask questions and study answers slowly and over time. Moving to face-to-face or skin-to-skin vastly increases tension and anxiety, which complicate clear thinking and judgment. (Some Cyber-players try to avoid a face to face meeting all together!)

With online dating, you have a tremendous advantage over meeting immediately flesh-to-flesh: You have a written record of what the other tells you. Make use of it!

http://www.kathrynblord.com/

Scorned Man Sends Bomb Threat and Makes it Appear Estranged Wife Sent It!

A scorned husband who tried to get his estranged wife arrested by emailing MI5 and claiming she had planted a bomb at a junior school was jailed for 16 months today.

Crazed Ghulam Kibria, 33, caused panic after he sent a chilling bomb threat to the security service’s website. He pretended to be his wife when he clicked on the MI5 'contact us' section of the site and wrote: 'There is a bomb planted in Prince Albert Junior and Infant School in Aston. There is nothing you can do - we can strike anytime, anywhere.'

Anti-terror police evacuated all 700 pupils and 110 staff at the school in Birmingham just seven minutes after receiving the email on November 8 last year.

Kibria was jailed for 16 months after he pleaded guilty to communicating a bomb hoax. Sentencing him at Birmingham Crown Court Judge John Maxwell said: 'The motive, we can be quite clear, was not to disrupt the school, to disrupt the neighbourhood, the motive was one of malice against the ex-wife to get her into trouble.

'You lived a perfectly respectable life until your life was turned upside down by an extremely unhappy marriage. You genuinely believe that your wife has committed great evil against you and so is the depth of your belief in that it has pushed you into a mental illness. You decided to get revenge against your ex-wife and you decided to issue a bomb hoax in her name and the motive simply that you were trying to get her arrested. It caused great fear. There was nothing short of panic. It was an offence that was inspired by malice and revenge.'

Kibria sent the email, which included the name and address of his ex-wife, to MI5 at 1.53pm. By 2pm all staff and pupils had been evacuated and police put a 100m exclusion zone around the school after the threat was taken 'considerably seriously' by MI5, the court heard. Children as young as three were carried outside in the freezing temperatures after the evacuation came while pupils changed for a PE lesson.

The court heard a 100-metre police cordon was set up around the school following the threat and two search teams of six officers in each were deployed to the school, along with an explosive detection dog and handler. Anti-terrorism officers swooped on Kibria’s ex-wife’s home who denied sending the threat. Officers arrested Kibria in Lidget Green, Bradford and seized his laptop which proved he had sent the message to MI5.

Kathryn Roughton, prosecuting, told the court, Kibria harboured a 'very profound and deep seated sense of resentment' towards his ex-wife. Regan Beggs, defending, said Kibria had suffered psychiatric difficulties but was not on medication when he sent the email.

Speaking after the hearing, Detective Inspector Neil Corrigan said: 'We take hoax bomb reports very seriously and will always work to bring offenders before the courts. 'Kibria’s actions wasted a significant amount of police time and resources, and could have taken officers away from more urgent matters. It also caused considerable inconvenience to teachers, pupils and parents at the school. We hope the fact that Kibria has been given a custodial sentence will act as a warning to others not to act so irresponsibly.'

original article found here

Recovering When Your Email is Hacked

It could happen to you. An unbelievable computer hoax that took many people by surprise. Investigators call it the 419 scam or the Nigerian scam.

Computer hackers find a way into your email accounts and send out hundreds of bogus messages saying. In this case, they say you are stranded in another country and need money.

It happened to our very own travel expert Sue McCarthy. She shared her story of getting her email and Facebook accounts straightened out.

original article here

Ex- Sheriff's Deputy Charged with Felony Over E-Threat

By Dan Nienaber

(MINNESOTA) A former Blue Earth County sheriff’s deputy has been charged with a felony for an alleged e-mail threat he sent to other deputies in November.

The terroristic threats charge was filed Wednesday against Richard Glenn Miller, 36, of Mankato. Miller resigned from his job as a deputy in December after being placed on paid administrative leave Nov. 11.

That was the day Miller allegedly sent an e-mail, with the subject “Union Contract,” to 14 other deputies at 5:46 a.m. He was the only deputy on duty at the time, the criminal complaint said.

After discussing upcoming union negotiations, Miller allegedly ended the e-mail with, “We absolutely need to have this added to our contract and if we don’t I’m gonna bring a gun into our office and shoot this place and everyone to hell.” The e-mail allegedly ended with “MILLER” in all capital letters.

Miller was put on administrative leave later that day after the e-mail was shown to Lt. David Karge and Capt. Rich Murry. Miller allegedly told Karge and Murry, who went to his house to confront him, that the e-mail was a joke, and he ends all of his e-mails with a “bit of his sense of humor,” the complaint said. Miller’s squad car, M16 rifle and handgun were taken at that time.

All of the deputies who received the e-mail, as well as Karge and Murry, were interviewed by Sgt. Steve Collins of the Scott County Sheriff’s Department. Three of the deputies said they felt threatened by the e-mail and several said they felt “slightly alarmed,” Collins reported.

Others said they weren’t threatened but could understand how the e-mail could be perceived as a threat, the complaint said.

Miller said Wednesday that he never intended to harm or threaten anyone.

“It was an expression meant in a humorous way, and it was taken out of context,” Miller said. “It was a phrase that’s commonly used.

“If I would have known I was going to threaten someone with what I said, I most certainly wouldn’t have said it.”

Miller also said it might have been a mistake to make the comment in an e-mail because it’s more difficult to convey that a phrase is meant to be humorous. If he would have said it in person, the other deputies would have seen him smiling and understood it wasn’t meant to be a threat, he said.

“They were co-workers and friends,” Miller said. “It’s a real tight group of people. Whenever you’re dealing with union negotiations, you always try to lighten the mood.

“It’s really hurtful that someone would think I’m capable of something like that. I’ve spent the last 13 years of my life trying to help people. To be accused of something like that is really hurtful.”

After Miller’s resignation, Blue Earth County Chief Deputy Mike Maurer would not disclose why Miller had been placed on paid leave or the reason for his resignation. Maurer would only say there was an internal investigation and that the Scott County department had been asked to do a criminal investigation.

The investigation ended in early January and was turned over to the Brown County attorney’s office to decide if any criminal charges should be filed. Scott and Brown counties were asked to help to avoid any conflicts of interest, Maurer said.

Miller, who had been a Blue Earth County deputy since 1999, had been disciplined twice before by superiors, according to personnel records available to the public.

In 2005, he was suspended for 10 hours without payhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif for failing to complete two training courses. He also was suspended without pay for one work week in February 2002 after he was arrested for driving while intoxicated. In that incident, Miller also was accused of distracting a state trooper so he would be pulled over instead of an intoxicated friend who was driving another car.

original article here

Hitman E-Scam Exposed

(United Kingdom) Hundreds of (retired) pensioners have been targeted by an email scam telling them to pay £5,000 or be killed by a HITMAN.

The chilling message, believed to be sent by an Eastern European gang, claims the "killers" have been watching OAPs in Eastbourne, East Sussex.

One woman victim aged 72, said: "I'm terrified. I checked my account to see if I had enough to pay them."

Cops dubbed the scam "particularly nasty".

ORIGINAL ARTICLE HERE

E-mail threat leads to cyberstalking charge

A Wilmington, North Carolina man faces a charge of cyberstalking after a Gastonia man told police he e-mailed death threats.

Keith Bailey, 39, told Gastonia Police that Melvin Franklin Douglas Lutz, 38, sent him threatening messages.

Bailey gave Gastonia Police an e-mail message sent May 24, 2007, where Lutz writes that Bailey had messed up their business and lied about raising profits.

"I sold my home out of desperation because of my legal responsibilities. You used that money to buy a motorcycle...," Lutz wrote via e-mail.

"This is a declaration of war. I am going (to do) everything I know to destroy your life both metaphorically (sic) and in reality. Every word out of your mouth is a lie, the world will be a much better place once I put you 6 feet under."

Bailey responded to his message with an e-mail of his own.

"What the hell are you talking about? I don't talk about you, think about you or do anything to you," Bailey wrote. "I have my own problems to deal with thanks to trying to help you and I don't have time to "(expletive) up" anything you're doing. I haven't a clue what you're doing, planning to do or have don't and don't want to know unless I have to."

Lutz faces a charge of cyberstalking and is in Gaston County Jail under a $1,000 secured bond.

A Love Triangle by E-Mail

It was Henry L. Stimson, serving as Herbert Hoover's Secretary of State, who famously said, "Gentlemen don't read each other's mail."

That was 1929. Things have changed.

The State Attorney's office in the Lisa Nowak case has released 250 pages of documents, and they make for steamy reading. We've posted some text HERE. Most of what you'll find are emails between Bill Oefelein, the fellow astronaut Nowak allegedly pined for, and Colleen Shipman, the Air Force captain he was seeing even before he broke up with Nowak.

You read right. Oefelein tells investigators that he did indeed have an affair with Nowak, starting in 2004. That apparently contradics her version, back in February, that their relationship, while "more than professional," was less than romantic.

"Bill is absolutely the best person I've ever known and I love him more than I knew possible," Nowak wrote in a letter to Oefelein's mother.

Take a look, as well, at Gina Sunseri's REPORT on the case. She says there's no suggestion of past psychiatric treatments, drug use, previous arrests--just dysfunctional relatonships, marriages in tatters, and badly-hurt feelings. (Some of you had wondered before.)

As with so many tawdry cases, you almost can't help watching. Thoughts, as always, are welcome.

(can you say Nowak is possibly a victim of a flaming narcissist/cyberpath? We are not excusing her behavior - but nothing happens in a vacuum)